March 4 2014

Buenos Aries, Argentina – The biggest worry about the current crisis in Ukraine is that if war begins it will not end in Crimea or Kyiv, that it will spread outwards and engulf Eastern Europe, Western Europe, and huge chunk of the world. As unlikely a scenario as that might be, it is a concern and one that is deeply troubling officials in Argentina who have become deeply concerned about their own border security.

“Clearly this crisis is a concern for the entire world and one that we all must pay attention to despite not really wanting to. It has potential to cause serious troubles and we are so concerned about that here in Argentina that we have taken steps to secure our border against any spread,” said one official.

Argentina is of course thousands of kilometres away on an entirely different continent but that reality has not concerned officials.

“We are all very profoundly concerned about what is happening in that country right now and we are concerned that Russia or Ukraine or someone else entirely might use this as an opportunity to strike against our sovereignty and that is something the government of Argentina will not stand for,” continued the official.

As a safety measure, the government has stockpiled both Russian and Ukrainian flags for potential burning.